CAPCon 2018

Let me first state that I was apprehensive about attending this event with all the issues leading up to it.

First let me say that this is my second capcon, but not my first convention or large function fetish or not.

I’m going to be fair and honest with you of how I felt about CAPcon.

The annoying stuff

Hotel related stuff – I find it utter bull that rooms needed to be paid up front, not to mention through a shady system like PayPal. Any other convention I have attended the hotel booking was totally handled by the hotel itself and rooms were secured with a credit card (even if the room was non refundable within 7-14 days would be better). What the organizers fail to fully comprehend is that some people truly live paycheck to paycheck so floating an extra $300+ 7 to 10 months out is extremely hard.

The room rates increased because breakfast was not included in the package.

Meals – while it is freaking awesome that you all decided to do meals, the idea of prepaying, then having an 18% gratuity slapped on there on top of the high amount for food turned people off.  From what I heard from others, the food was not truly worth the cost.  It also sucked that you could not just buy a general Lunch or Dinner ticket and use it for whatever day you wanted…. which meant if you missed lunch on Friday, they were not able to be used for Saturday.  Again most travelers expect a breakfast included in the cost of their accommodations it is as simple as that.

The pre-con dinner – frankly being required to repurchase a ticket for an onsite buffet just so you could socialize with people before the con stinks.

Why am I harping on food? – Some people don’t like or do buffets, some people have special dietary restrictions and need to stay away from certain foods, or cannot eat enough to get the value out of the meal.

The schedule – First off the con did not start on Thursday in my opinion.  Other cons that state they start on Thursday actually have activities and con space open on that first day. The only activities were an opening ceremony, which I was not arrived for, and a pre con dinner which as I stated above could have been done different so those who don’t care to eat could at least socialize.  This just seemed to be a ploy to make people think that the con was longer than it was.

Next your schedule was hard to read, not that it mattered as you didn’t keep to it. Class location changes, events added, events moved, etc… in the future you should post a daily board with what is happening, when and where….. or do something like a daily newsletter like a cruise does.  Also have a break in the schedule for dinner and lunch; I mean how are people supposed to eat the overpriced hotel buffet that they had to prepay and preplan for when there is no time to get food.

Digital Devices – This was a big joke.  One there is no way you can see if those stickers had been tripped by just a casual glance.  Two nobody was checking them.  Three, they take away from the convention in a way.  I work for a wireless carrier, i hae a phone in my hand every day all day.  For me it was so nice to NOT bring my phone with me to the con space.  My phone and iPad were in my room unless I was leaving the hotel for dinner.

Photography – I decided to go red band this year due to the debacle last year.  While it will be sad that I will not be in any photos or receiving any photos from the con, it is what it is.  Personally I did not see the official con photographer very often.

A cool idea would be to have an area or “scene” setup for people to get a posed photo (like you have at an amusement park, or attraction).  I think that the spacecraft rocker that Tykeables brought with a space backdrop behind it would have been a great photo opportunity for the attendees to have something that has the convention name and if needed names of the sponsors on it.  The key being that it is something that they can take with them immediately either as a hard print or emailed to themselves.

Just because I am red band, does not mean I don’t want photos…. I just want control over who has my photos.

 

 

Now What I Loved.

The vendors.  I bought pin-on buttons from a vendor upstairs, a pacifier and clip from Little Kink.

I loved the classes that I attended, babiedboi’s  classes always bring the warmth and love of the community out.

I loved the presentation by Cwis  from Abysitter.com and look forward to the results of the survey that he conducted being posted along with the video (update here is the video)  – I want to know that there are others out there like me, those who got their start in diapers at a very very early age.  I want to know what makes up this community, how we all got started, and hopefully find out if there is a common thread in all our lives… so far I really don’t think there is anything that draws us all to diapers and being little other than we just like wearing diapers and being little

Shout out to Zach (Mid America Little) and Andy (The Padded Puppy) for their session on positive social media for the ABDL community.  It has made me get closer to going over the fence and starting to vlog about my life of being an ABDL.  What holds me back now is the fear of my family, friends, etc finding the content and finding out about me.  Also if I can handle the negative aspect of the comments that could ensue, and if I am stable enough to put me out there.  Plus I need to find a place to be able to video at…. those who truly know me know my house is a mess and packed to the gills with stuff.

Last but not least I cannot forget being able to see so many wonderful friends that I have made over the years.  People I follow on instagram and people I have chatted with over the past 22 years that  have been on the internet.  Without the encouragement of many of these people over the years, many of us ABDL’s would not have what we have today.  It is so cute to see AB’s that were not even born when I got back into diapers, many of them still have that youthful exuberance in them as I watched them tear up and down the play space on the big wheels and trikes.  Oh to have that level of physical youth again to go with the youthful mindset.  For me I am happy just snuggling with my Pooh bear, drinking my bottle and relaxing in a quiet place.

I am shy at first and then I will open up and you’ll wish I was too shy to speak.

Some closing thoughts:

If you are an ABDL, Little, AgePlayer, Diaper Lover, Adult Toddler…. whatever you consider yourself.  You are truly NOT ALONE.  I know it can be scary to meet others, but rest assured that we all thought we were alone in this at one time or another.  Look up a nearby munch if going to a full blown party or convention is just too much for you at this point in your life; but get out there and be yourself.

If you are on the fence about going to a convention or party, and it is within driving distance…..GO FOR IT!!!  You will not regret it.  If it gets to be too much, find a quiet place or go back to your room.

 

 

I’ve been very neglectful.

I used to blog almost all the time but have fallen away from doing it.  Does anybody still read blogs anymore…. it seems it all is Instagram, YouTube, Snapchat, etc…

Well, I am going to TRY to start blogging again. I just checked and it appears that I lost my diaper diary that I used to keep going clear back to 1996.  Yes for you young littles, I’ve been back in diapers longer than some of you’ve been alive.

I just turned the big 4-0, and I don’t really feel older, but I am… I can’t hang with the young kids anymore in terms of partying, drinking, knowing what’s hip and cool.  But then again I never could.

As I grow older (but not UP!) I am finding myself feeling “alone”.  While I’m never really alone except on the drive to and from work; I live with my mother who is getting older too.  I know one day she won’t be around, and I will then be truly alone… with nobody to do things with, nobody to share my secret with that can give me an outsiders point of view.

I say that I’m not looking for anybody, but I am looking, but I will wait until I find that special person that I can spend my life with, and not just a season.

I tell my mom that I don’t want her to feel like she is tying me down or holding me back from doing what I want to do, but in a ways I think I’m tying myself down taking care of her, not wanting to abandon her like my dad did.

Then again I wonder if I am the one holding her back.  Let’s face it, I am a 40 year old manchild, who’s mom packs his lunch, does his laundry, and basically cleans up after him. All these tasks I could probably do on my own, but if left to do them would certainly mess them up.

I have dreams that I want to attain.  Recently I have really latched onto wanting a crib; a nursery of my own.  I want to wake up each day, teddybear in a hug, me in my onsie and diaper; to look out and see a barrier keeping me in my bed.  It does not need to be a huge crib like you see at the conventions or on the TV shows making fun of us.  Just simply a bed that I cannot just swing my feet over the edge of the bed and get out of.

Where do I go from here?  I don’t know, I really just take it day to day…. I plan special time ahead, like CAPCon where I am sitting here typing this as I watch the sun rise on the last official day of the event.  I’ve got TeddyCon coming up.  I also know that I can wear pretty much on the weekends and days off along with overnight.